I'm going to do this in reverse order to build up the tension that I know you'll be feeling. As you approach the end you'll be thinking to yourself oooh he hasn't said Are You Smarter than a 10 year old? yet. Is it going to be in there? Lets find out shall we?
10. Don't Forget The Lyrics
In many ways this is a controversial choice. I mean it was hosted by Shane Richie for one thing and the contestants were almost always the kind of wankers that think they're Frank Sinatra and will be the first on stage at a Karaoke bar. For some reason I enjoyed it. Perhaps for the fact that the singers almost always ended up humiliating themselves or maybe because it taught me that a lot of song lyrics, when you see them written down, are ridiculous.
9. 15 to 1
This is one for quiz purists really. Dry man in grey suit asks questions to dead ordinary looking people. Shouldn't work but does. If you pitched it to a TV channel now I'm pretty sure you'd be laughed out of the room although there is the nominating element which gives the show undertones of hate and seething resentment. They have recently re made it with "comedian" Sandy Toksvig hosting and amazingly it's even drier than the original.
8. In It To Win It
Still going to this day IITWI is essential viewing in my house. It's mostly multiple choice questions which slightly annoys me and the contestants have obviously been told to ramble on for ages before giving their answers but I can't get enough. The threat of having to enter Dale Winton's red area hangs in the air and the way the show works means you can put all the money in the jackpot and someone else can then win it all. Other enjoyable aspects are the "funny" walks over to winner's row and guessing what's wrong with Dale Winton.
7. The Crystal Maze
What's not to like? Bat shit crazy host. Moronic contestants. Amazing concept. Brilliant theme tune. I honestly don't know why they're not still making this? If I had 3 wishes I think one of them would be to have access to the Aztec zone of the Crystal Maze and just run around for a day. "To The Crystal Dome" is still a phrase I use on a regular basis regardless of where I'm actually going. Magical.
You can't beat a bit of bully! Evidently you can as it's at number 6 but nevertheless this show brings back magical memories of freezing cold winter Sunday evenings after playing junior football. Jim Bowen's shit jokes, incompetent darts players and working class people who live in Wolverhampton winning speed boats are just some of the reasons this is TV gold. If you watch it on Challenge TV now, which I often do, what stands out to me now is how old people looked in the late 80's and early 90's. Gaunt looking men with thinning grey hair, no teeth and paedophile moustaches say "I'm 23 Jim" and you're like WHAT? People slate modern life but in some fields we've come a long way.
5. Family Fortunes
I often imagine the conversations that the families must have had when picking their team to go on this show. Clever daughters not being picked because they're too shy to go on TV and idiot Uncles making the cut simply on the grounds that they're "a bit of a character". Let's face it this show is brilliant because of the stupid answers. There are hour long videos on you tube purely made up of stupid things said on family Fortunes. I urge you to watch them and make your day a little brighter.
"Say what you See", "It's good but it's not the one", "Fast and furious It's the Ready Money Roind!" "What's Mr Chips doing?" . This show has contributed so much to Western culture and to my vast array of impressions that I can't thank it enough. Obviously the updated version with that dork from kids tv is rubbish but the original is just perfection. Here is one of the best television moments of all time.
3. Who Dares Wins
As somebody who loves making lists this show was always going to score highly. What could be more fun than naming as many Tom Cruise films as you can? If you haven't seen the show that's just an example, it's not just about Tom Cruise. Nick Knowles is fine as the host but I don't really notice him. It could just as well be hosted by a baked potato. No this show is all about the concept. I also like the winner stays on aspect, the bluffing and the fact that you're put on a team with a total stranger. Lovely stuff. When is this coming back?
This is the best quiz show currently on TV right now and that's a fact. All you Tipping Point fans out there can sod off. Being rewarded for knowing obscure things is a geek's dream and given that I've just written a list of my top 10 favourite game shows you can safely assume I fall into that camp. The bantz between host Alexander Armstrong and geek-master general Richard Osman is just as much fun as the quizzing and that's why I watch it every weekday while having my tea. I'd like to point out at this juncture that I am married to a real life woman and have real life friends. Pointless probably would have been number one but my sister and I applied to go on it and though we got an e mail after the audition saying we had qualified to go on it we never got the phone call.
1. Shooting Stars
Not technically a quiz show? There were people answering questions. Brilliant questions at that. Here's some of the best:
True or false. Bill Cosby was the world's first black man. False. It was Sydney Poitier.
Macauley Culkin is a child but can you name an adult?
True or false. Jeremy Irons.
And if that wasn't enough here's the best thing on youtube.
Thanks for sticking with me. Next week my top 10 military conflicts! Jez x